WHY DO I GET STUCK IN LIFE or IN RELATIONSHIPS?
At times you may find yourself trying to move forward in life and in your relationship and nothing you do takes where you want to go.
The reason might be SELF-SABOTAGE.
There are many reasons why people engage in self-sabotaging behaviors that derail their own progress in life. Here are some reasons people self-sabotage:
- Fear of progress or responsibilities – connected to moving on/up. Yes. Progress is scary! Getting out of your comfortable zone is stressful. The thought of having to make your decisions can be frightening. But there’s ways to overcome it all.
- Fear of Failure – which can prevent yourself to even try something new. If you have tendency to “be perfect” or “not disappoint others” you might be thinking twice in engaging on a new activity, as you don’t want to fail it; as opposed to “try it and see how that would go.”
- Fear of Freedom – because making decisions when no one is watching can be scary. In the past, it was so easy to blame parents, principals, or other people why your life was stuck and not moving forward. Now that YOU have the freedom to make your own decisions, you may feel that this freedom comes with a price of having to take own responsibility.
- Shame and Insecurity – from unresolved feelings from past where you think you “don’t deserve it”. Someone may have you think that you are not good enough, or love/cared enough to have good things in life. You may have acted in a way that would bring shame and guilt. Dwelling on the past and not moving forward is the worst thing you could do for your own development. History is to remind us to not commit same mistake, not to stall us from moving forward.
- Anger and resentment – towards self or others – as revenge or rebellion. If you are putting a lot of energy in being angry at some situation or a person and is holding resentment for what happened to you, you may be wasting the time you should be applying to moving forward.
What can you do?
For starters, self-awareness is important. Notice where you are now and where you want to go.
Try to find ways to forgive your mistakes and mistakes of others.
Look for a psychotherapist that can help you heal past wounds and move on.
There’s nothing better in human development than being cognizant of who you are, where you belong, and where you are going.
Reach out for help here at
Tampa Therapy and Wellness